THE DATE IS SET

December 22, 2015

Yesterday at my doctors appointment we went ahead and set a c-section date for our second little bird. I am finally at a place where saying that i'm having a c-section doesn't make me feel less than when it comes to delivery. For several reasons with Ru, after an entire day of labor I ended up having to have an emergency section and I struggled for a while after her birth with how my plan just did not go, well, to plan. At all. (You can read her birth story HERE.) Now I know that we did what we had to do and what was best for our daughter. She came into the world safe and healthy because I had a care team that put their expertise to work and delivered my baby the safest way they could. I'm so thankful for that. 

When we found out I was pregnant again I was insistent on having a vbac. As the months passed though, I never felt a sense of peace and calm around my decision. I wanted so badly to feel 100% confident in the idea of a vbac (gosh I want / wanted to have a natural childbirth experience so badly,) but I just couldn't get there. The risk of a uterine rupture (although small) was just enough for me to not want to chance not coming home to my girls and husband. The way my body dealt with labor the first time was also a concern. I did not want to labor all day again and then have to have a c-section in the end. Of course there is just no way of knowing how any of it will go but I spent a lot of time weighing options and if I was going to try for a vbac I wanted to be FULLY committed to it. I had a conversation with a friend about making my c-section experience a beautiful one  and it really helped me get to a place of peace. I'm excited about the calm, known aspect of this second birth. I know that natural childbirth can be very calm but in my experience the first time around it was anything but. Things like, being able to tell Ru when the baby is coming and to plan her hospital visit and her schedule with grandparents is also good for my mama planning heart. So while my choice for another c-section is not the best choice for everyone, it is what feels right for me and I'm so, so thankful that I've finally come to terms with it. Now watch me go into labor before my date! ha! 

ps. Christmas in 3 days!? What?!

MY STORY TELLER

December 20, 2015

My little love bug - the story teller. I can't even begin to describe how much and how eloquently my little talks. I know that sounds so boastful and I wish it were some genius parenting feat I could take credit for but her language- her ability to speak so fully and fluently is all her and has been so amazing to witness as her mama. She started talking at 15 months and could form a full sentence at 18. Now, at almost 3 years old the things she says blows my mind daily and makes me hysterically laugh at the same time. Having a little best friend around you can just chat the day away with is truly and utterly the very best thing for my mama heart, especially with a second little baby bird heading our way in the next month. Having Ru be able to communicate with me all her little heart's joys and worries is making the transition from baby to big sister for her so much easier - because I know exactly how she is feeling we have been able to talk through all of her emotions. I'm finding that fact alone to be so reassuring that this huge change in all of our lives is going to be smooth as butter (At least that is what I'm telling myself!)

Speaking of a second little bird - I'm super excited about my new Lily Jade tote. It's the perfect carryall for everything from diapers to snacks to an extra change of clothes, to mama's essentials too. I also love that I can rock this bag in the times I'm not with my girls. It's the little things, like a great bag that help make our days as mama's just a teensy bit easier. Don't you think?

GETTING READY FOR BABY

December 17, 2015


I really cannot believe we are only 5 weeks away from meeting this babe. I don't know if it's just me or all mama's who already have a child(ren) but it has flown by much faster than the first time around and I feel so unprepared even though I know what to (semi) expect. I was so ready for Ru. So ready to hold her in my arms - be her mama. I'm more scared for how I'll transition from having one child to two than I was from zero to one. I know once she is in my arms, my fears and anxieties will be gone but I've come to accept that it isn't happening for me now and probably won't until the moment i'm holding her. For the longest time I only thought about the things i'd be loosing - my one on one time with Ru. My undivided and devoted attention to her. Laying with her each and every night while she drifts to sleep. Our easy, carefree days where the agenda revovles mostly around what she'd like to do. All those things will shift in some ways and while that's okay and part of growing our family, I'm giving myself grace to mourn. I'm so excited to add another love to our clan and Ru can't even contain her joy over baby sister - the moment she meets her I think will be the closest I'll ever feel to heaven on earth and I can't wait for it, but for now, I'm savoring the heck out of this special time as the mama to one.

TONIGHT AT MADEWELL!

December 10, 2015

I'm super excited about a fun shopping event i'll be hosting TONIGHT at Madwell in Cincinnati from 6-8 pm with sweet treats from my favorite Brown Bear Bakery and of course Champagne to sip (you can have extra on my behalf! :) 25% off your entire purchase too! Hope to see you! 

ps. this fantastic illustration was hand painted by the incredibly talented Joya from Rajovilla

 

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